The Tory Party

The Major and the Donut

I wrote a four-page essay on this photo for Art History class (studying Camera Lucida, livin’ the dream) but it boils down to this:

I like my dad.

FIN

Dad Hoke on “Flags of Our Fathers”

dad feels that “flags of our fathers” was “million dollar baby goes to war.” hillary swank’s character was divided into three pretty guys.

Dad Hoke on New Zealand

dad had always been intrigued by new zealand, in that dad feels that new zealand is australia’s australia.

Dad Hoke on Cody Production Photos

Of all the production pictures dad has ever seen, these are definitely some of them.

Herz und stolz, dad

Dad Hoke on Climbing Ships

[Dad Hoke writes in this obtuse third-person style on purpose — and I do too when I write to him. Hokes don’t have time for commas. All misspellings are intentional and meant to be pronounced as they are spelled. I recommend trying this out loud. - T]

dad knows that tony and the frehhnds of tony are going to have the strongest cores ever due to rock climbing and general clean living.

dad is currently doing pullups and laundry and e-mailing tony. type a dad.

dad bemembers waiting at navy piers as a kid for pop pop to return from a cruise and seeing the gint ships looming overhead and the brown water filled with jellyfish between the pier and the ships. dad lived close to beaches and was comfortable in the water but wondered what dad would do if dad fell into this water. the overhead looming ships offered nothing but gint perpendicular hulls of gray steel. dad feels that youthful dad felt claustrophobic about this.

so twelve ten or so years later when dad was at camp pendleton after having been to vietnam and being exposed to danger several times, dad and some of the mehhhn of dad had to ride a navy boat out to a ship close to san diego to plan the embarkation of the battalion dad was in which would board the ship later. it was night time and therefore dark. when the boat got beside the ship in the dark, the mehhn on the ship threw a chain ladder over the side for dad and the mehhn of dad to climb up which was 30 or forty feet high. the mehhn of dad looked at dad as if to say, “you first, lootenant,” so dad started climbing.

dad had a pack and pistol and canteens and stuff on as well as boots and utilities and helmet. the mehhn of dad knew that dad was strong. one said something like “is that going to be hard?” and when dad started climbing and it obviously took everything had by dad to get up the ladder, another one of dad’s mehhn commentated, “yeh, it’s hard.”

while climbing the youthful claustrophobical thoughts of dad occurred to dad and dad remembers that the whole experience was anaerobic, adrenaline-filled, and forearm-pumping. the mehhn of dad made it up the ladder ok, and the rest of the battalion boarded the ship a couple of days later by walking up a gangplank which made dad and the mehhn of dad feel superior.

also bemember that the deck of the ship hangs way out from the hull of the ship so the ladder was hanging in empty space.

dad is eager to look at the website of tony and will do so during breakfast. after breakfast dad is going to walk nackie and then go to the [Best Friends Pet Adoption] adoptathon at 11 am. dad will probably not have time to take a shower beforehand. the adoptathon leader is pretty rigid, so dad hopes that the adoptathon leader does not send dad home for stinking.

herz, dad.