Casting Call – Jeff Buckley and James Franco

Posted by Tory, August 1, 2008 on 3:47 pm | In Amusements, Casting Call | 4 Comments

Buckley Franco

Yeah, I still got it.

And I didn’t have to resize these images or even look very hard for them. IT WAS DESTINY.

MAKE BIOPIC IMMEDS PLS KTHX.

Casting Call 11 – Eyebrows Edition

Posted by Tory, April 5, 2007 on 9:28 pm | In Casting Call | No Comments

After long hiatus, lucky eleven. Hotties, Brits, and peeps from Lost.


Teh sex4y!

They can squint into a wide angle lens and still look good. Rareness.

I warned you.

I rule!


Someone needs to take charge of getting better pictures of Iben Hjejle up so I can steal them.

Quick story: some film student told a story about physically bumping into Ron Perlman at some get-together, and Ron Perlman was
unhappy about it and made a frowny face at him or something. So this film student was like, “Yeah, that Ron Perlman, he’s a jerk.”

But check it — when you’re the biggest dude in the room, every drunk jerk wants to pick a fight with you. Multiply that by
famous. Then multiply that by famous-for-playing-tough-guys, and you’ve got someone who can *never* go drinkin’. So when somebody
bumps into you at a party (and you’re Ron Perlman, so it’s not like they didn’t see you standing there), then you’re probably going
to be unhappy with them as a pre-emptive strike at least.

So that’s what I think.

Addendum, 2005/18/08: *Don’t Multiply it by the fact that Mr. Perleman’s visage is a heavy-browed one and that he frequently looks like is he is growly or frowning, even when he isn’t! A botox candidate if I ever saw one. – Aunti


Maybe they are the sa-a-a-ame. I couldn’t really find pictures to show the likeness, but it’s there. Oh yes. It’s there.


Okay. This one is much better. I am pwned.

Casting Call 10 – Chins and Dimples

Posted by Tory, April 5, 2007 on 9:27 pm | In Casting Call | No Comments

Ten… ten… TEN Casting Calls! Ah ah ah!


You’d think someone with a career as long and varied as Mary Steenburgen would have better pictures to choose from, but WOTEVER.

One is a god and one is the devil. Can you figure out which? Also note Barbara has had her nose and chin edited to achieve the Cox effect.


Looks like Ryan Phillipe *didn’t* make a face, but it stuck like that anyway.

Spooky tortured scientist eyes redux!

Phil Lamarr is teh hottness.

Casting Call 9 – Hottie Edition

Posted by Tory, April 5, 2007 on 9:26 pm | In Casting Call | No Comments

Teh Hottness.



Remember that time Mark Ruffalo was in In the Cut, 13 Going On 30, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and Collateral as four totally different, age-shifting characters? Rock on, Ruffalo.
Ruffalo + chiseled = Bratt

Who looks this good in a 3/4 shot? Nobody, that’s who.


It’s almost like they’re from the same region. And, yeah, I totally snarfed the Lundgren image from The Onion.
Also a little like Ann Wilson (of Heart), but I couldn’t find a good picture.

Noticed because both of them look like my heckling partner. My friends are teh hottness!!!1 Although the heckling partner does not list to the right thusly.


Yay for good casting!


Heh — McConaughey Johnson. Where’s the bongo drum?

I so nearly peed.

Casting Call 8

Posted by Tory, April 5, 2007 on 9:24 pm | In Casting Call | No Comments

Watch me try to keep my politics out of my Casting Call.


The blond versions of each, anyway.
Jessica Simpson could be in here, too.

Does this mean in four years Dean will also
be tongue-kissing Karl Rove?
When I see my beautiful wife slandered
in South Carolina… I just go BERSERK!

I ain’t hatin’. Dude’s wrinkly, is all.
Sidebar: My sister’s a doctor, so it’s
not all glee and cobbler at the Hoke house
about Edwards’ nomination. But still —
the dude really did come up from nothing,
won some incredible cases, and his platform is decently
progressive. All my dirty hippies sing with me:
“You can’t… always get… what you want…
but if you try sometimes… you just might find…
You get what you NEED!”


It’s like a Mason-Dixon mirror.

I do a pretty good vocal impression of Mira Sorvino, but I guess it’s not much use here.

It pains me because I think Snape is the hottness. Brad Dourif — not since Alien Resurrection.

Doozer sticks and radishes are the new Atkins!


On a vaguely related note, does “kicking screaming gucci little piggy” really mean the Spice Girls?


I can’t believe I hadn’t put this one up yet. These two may be the same person. You’d think SNL would get more mileage out of this.

Only today have I realized that Dominique Swain is not the Orbit Gum Girl. I am so faced.

All three of these women bear resemblance to a friend of mine, although Brooke Burns has been edited for content in order to achieve this look. (To the tune of “Macho Man”:) Not your, not your no-o-o-ose! That snub nose… is not yo-our nose…
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