Gards

Posted by Tory, August 12, 2008 on 8:09 am | In Amusements |

In a moment of need, I applied a dime to the ladies’ room vending machine and received this:

dsc07256.JPG
Dear Lord, it’s the size of a car stereo

I should have known something hilarious would happen when the machine didn’t specify which KIND of thing it dispensed. Obviously these are from an era when you only had one option, but be grateful it didn’t come with a belt. Coworker Melissa wagered this box dates back to the year this tower was built — ‘74? Vestal Goodman would be proud.

I’ll spare you documentation of the object that came in it, but it was THE SAME SIZE.

Let’s take a closer look at the photo here.

Gards
So nice of my husband to send me these during my unclean time.

It’s okay, this time will pass. Soon society will accept you again.

There’s no date on the packaging, but those buttons are so 1986.

5 Comments »

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  1. That is some serious protection….no wonder she feels confident about wearing a white suit. My guess is that each of the buttons on her suit would cover about half of her feminine hygiene product of choice.

    Comment by deb — August 12, 2008 #

  2. When I was in need of one of those for like my second period ever in middle school I’m pretty sure the nurse handed me one of those. It was about an inch thick, and I always had plenty of the new fangled thin ones in my locker after that.

    Comment by Sarah — August 13, 2008 #

  3. HA HA HA HA! AH HA HA HA!

    Deb - I totally overlooked the white suit juxtaposish. But her nails are red. RED AS PAIN.

    and Sarah - an inch thick is about right. I’m getting rid of some furniture and I think I can go on and sell my bed now and sleep on two of these for the next week.

    FOR ONLY TEN CENTS APIECE!

    Comment by Tory — August 13, 2008 #

  4. That picture immediately makes me think of this…

    http://www.coverbrowser.com/covers/worst-album-covers

    Comment by Your Anomalous Fan — August 13, 2008 #

  5. May I say that while you were unfortunate enough to be the consumer of said product, it did make my freakin’ day.

    Comment by Mel — August 13, 2008 #

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