The Tory Party

Sunburn

I found this picture on the Duke.edu server. I don’t know what it means, but it’s scientific and hilarious. Nevertheless, Duke sucks. GO HEELS!

I was taking a shower, which is something I do from time to time, and got to the incidental washing that forearms tend to get (you know — hair, face, pits and crotch are red zones, back and feet are yellow, and the rest of the boddy gets cursory treatment at best. When was the last time you were like “oh man, I need a shower! My calves are so dirty!”)

Anyhoo, I got hot water on my forearm and I was like DEAR GAWD WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY FOREARM?! And then I was like, ohhhh, that is a sunburn. Ohhhhh. Haven’t had one of those in a while. But I was sitting in the sun having coffee with a friend for a couple of hours and you can tell where I put my daily SPF 15 and who got the short shrift… AGAIN. Sorry, forearm. Sorry, hairline.

I used to get burned all the time. I used to be into sunburn like some people are into Sudoku. I would run out of the house thinking, meh, I’m fine, I’m Malibu Barbie! And then come limping back 24 hours later thinking HAVE MERCY ON MY SOUL WHAT HAVE I DONE.

I’ve been pretty diligent about sunscreen and avoiding sun for the past eight or nine years — which tells you I was still doing dopey things when I was 21 or so, which is too long to do dopey things, but oh well.

Let us not speak of the mole on my cheek that is doing erratic things of late. Finally it occurs to me I could see the school doctor in the week my student insurance is still valid. And I must ask, is that wise? Or does that just make it a pre-existing condition for the next insurer I might have?

AH HA HA I KID. Not really. NO, I KID.