The X-10 Camera

Posted by Tory, October 29, 2001 on 7:00 pm | In Amusements | No Comments


… and the number one use of the X-10 camera …

… apparently letting soft-fingered pre-teens take pictures of flat-chested dental technicians in their underwear.
Thank you, pop-up window! Now that’s a special moment!

J-Lo`s response to defeat

Posted by Tory, October 28, 2001 on 7:00 pm | In Amusements | No Comments



I still can’t believe Carole King beat J-Lo. I am traumatized. But I have to ask myself, What Would J-Lo Do?


10. Voice her silent protest with rump-shaking madness
9. Make up with P-Diddy
8. Shorten name to just an uneasy facial expression
7. Hire Babyface to write a song about it
6. Hire Gloria Estefan to write a song about it
5. Make a dance remix that sucks monkeys
4. Wear a thong to an award show and complain about being objectified
3. Get her earrings back from Nelly Furtado
2. Give to me my leather, take from me my lace
1. Grieve that she buried her acting talent like a tiny time capsule of doom

Vincent D`Onofrio broke my heart

Posted by Tory, October 20, 2001 on 8:00 pm | In Amusements | No Comments

My Opinion of Vincent D`Onofrio Over Time

Tiny Tizzim

Posted by Tory, October 8, 2001 on 8:00 pm | In Amusements | No Comments
Tiny Tizzim, the lost rapper

Discovered 12 years too late for MC Hammer positive rap and 16 years too late for Fresh Prince fun rap, Tiny Tizzim’s critically acclaimed 2001 debut album, “Day Job”, was buried under a heap of songs about bootys, alcohol, Glocks and Escalades. In remembrance is its track list posted:

1. Monday at the Office
2. Let’s Get Married
3. 32 City, 36 Highway
4. Dr. Jackson
5. Giving Some Back
6. Savings Account
7. Hot Tub (Just Me)
8. She Went to Stanford
9. Straight Edge
10. Not Even Cable
11. 401K
12. Honda Honda

CNN cleans up after Dubya

Posted by Tory, October 7, 2001 on 8:00 pm | In Amusements | No Comments
The online front-page version
CNN cleanup crew

I`m glad we’ve got Colin Powell on our side, because our president has got to be the stupidest man in politics. As evidence I present a quote so tragically rock dumb that CNN cleaned it up–twice, two different ways–and it’s still stupid.

The man is a joke.

The “Full Story” version


The transcript version. Click on it for the whole horrible transcript.

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