MAY 5

9:43 AM Tory: O MAN MAH UTERUS. It woke me up last nite! Like a kid asking for a glass of water and some Tylenol

APRIL 8

Tory: ha ha ha It always takes me so long to remember ibuprofen exists and works beautifully Drew: awwww Poor crazy lady plumbing11:00 AM Tory: ha ha ha For me there is always the moment where it’s like “That’s it. This is the time I bleed to death.” But then it’s fine.11:01 AM Drew: ha also AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHRGHLDFSGJ Tory: Wot is dat?11:02 AM Drew: my brain screaming Tory: aboot? Drew: See above re: bleeding to death11:04 AM Tory: ahhhh11:05 AM ha ha ha ha ha Your blood called. It says “Thanks for keeping me inside your body.”

March 5

1:12 PM Tory: I heard on the radio that it is very rare for the Cali court to overturn a prop Drew: Yeah1:13 PM But the key here is that the proposition revised the constitution of the state The court says “this part of the Constitution says they have the right”1:14 PM the prop takes away that right, but the language doesn’t reflect a revisionary change Tory: It is a leetle open to interpretation whether the definition of marriage implies man+woman Drew: Oh, but that’s not what the prop’s about Tory: O RLY? Drew: that’s what it is in other states1:15 PM but in california, the equal protection clauses were interpreted as defining marriage for everyone Prop 8″ eliminates the right of same-sex couples to marry”1:16 PM Tory: isn’t the idea that they never had it to begin with? Constitutionally-speaking? Drew: Nope They did have it. Then the prop took it away.1:17 PM Tory: oh yah Drew: And also, it unmarries all the gays Tory: that part is krez1:18 PM Drew: which is kind of a violation of due process well, definitely a violation of the spirit of due process Tory: there’s no doubt it is a ridiculous situation Drew: but there’s nothing in place to deal with something like this, because it’s really outside the powers of a ballot initiative Tory: the end of the end1:19 PM Drew: hopefully the end of the beginning. Tory: change is constant the only constant faw! All absolutes are dangerous, including this one. faw faw!1:21 PM Drew: fa! fa! If this passes, i’m gonna start getting signatures for a ballot initiative that says Chinese people can’t go swimming

March 5

12:49 PM Drew: I forget what it was but did I mention that I want to strangle Ken Starr?12:51 PM Tory: woh what for THEES time?12:52 PM and have we mentioned that Sawyer looks like a follicled version of Locke? Drew: This time it’s him talking at the cali supreme court today trying to unmarry gay people12:53 PM says that inalienable means can’t be taken away except by appropriate process which is exactly opposite of what it means12:54 PM Tory: dag12:55 PM that guy can’t STOP acting terrible Y’Ever read “The Woman Who Wouldn’t Talk”?12:56 PM http://www.amazon.com/Woman-Who-Wouldnt-Talk-Clintons/dp/078671302X/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1236282953&sr=8-1 Susan McDougal’s bewk12:57 PM she’s the one who went to jail rather than testify against the Clintons That’s Kenny S’s work Drew: Yeah, what was it that he was supposed to be doing?12:58 PM (I haven’t read that book, and probably shouldn’t for my blood pressure’s sake) Whitewater shadiness?1:00 PM Tory: yeh he was hired to find charges against the Clintons1:01 PM to the tune of $40 million couldn’t make anything happen with Whitewater and finally he found an intern Drew: with a bad dry cleaner Tory: Gotta say, those Clintons must be pretty clean if that’s all he had1:02 PM (she never cleaned the dress, IIRC) Drew: yeah, but that’s not as funny

Drew: 2:40 PM No! You didn’t! I want to see orange college tory

Tory: ha ha I rocked it It lewked gewd2:41 PM You’d be fewled (unless I am fewling meself)

Drew: A tan hoke? I would not be fooled

Tory: I still have eet! I could use it TOMORROW ha ha ha2:42 PM

Drew: “Tory Hoke died today after using long expired tanning creme. The Iron Oxide entered her blood stream and basically just ripped shit up. She is survived by her loving parents, sister, and Jake the Dawg.”2:46 PM

Tory: weirdo2:47 PM

Drew: It can happen!

Drew: A SQL query walks up to two tables in a restaurant and says: “Mind if I join you?”

Tory: OMG you are on probation

Drew: Cause and effect : http://twitpic.com/agpcf

Tory: ha ha o dear 99 cent condomes

reminds me fave euphemism for condoms/pregtest aisle is “Planning”

Just “Planning”

Drew: haha

Yessss

Albertson’s puts condoms in the diaper aisle

Tory: buying diapers reminds you to buy condomes

and vice versa

Drew: Seeing diapers reminds me to praise condoms and make them a burnt offering

Drew: One of the tiki people says there’s better yogurt in culver center at the boba tea place

Tory: no

no wai

is that yogurt

WALKING DISTANCE?

I THINK NO.

Drew: Culver

Center

Tory: wait

Drew: Same

Place

Tory: wait

Drew: Boba place

walking

Tory: HEAD ASPLODE

Drew: distance

Tory: PKKSSSSSH!

SHPLKSSSSSSSSH!

Drew: OH NOE

Tory: SCANNERSPPPLKSH!

Drew: YOUR HEAD ASPLODE

Drew: http://www.boingboing.net/2009/08/11/dan-clowes-interview.html

Tory: Ha ha ha I just read that

Cracked had 1 or 2 great freakin’ artists, tho

John Silverstein?

Frak, what was his name…

hang on…

Ha ha ha John Severin

He’s 88 and still working

drawing is the way to go

those people live forever

Mort Drucker is 80

still going

Drew: jeezum

Jeezem

look at drucker’s wiki picture

taken NINE YEARS ago

oh dang

http://www.cagle.com/hogan/reubens/reubens2006/drucker_delbo.jpg

here is in ought six

lookin pretty hale and hearty

Tory: Yeah!

And remember he looked the same at 40

just with darker hair

AL JAFFEE IS 88!!!

AHHHH!

His work looks exactly the same!

And he’s still just as prolific!

HOLY CRAPPE.

Whew Sergio Aragones is 71

OK, that is acceptable

but Al Jaffee is 88?!

WTFFFFFUUUUUUU

Jack Davis is 85

OK I have to stop

When the laws of physics tell me I only have 10-20 more years of these guys

my heart can’t stand it.

Drew: 10-20?

Tory: Let me have my dream.

If anybody’s gonna live to be 115

it’s an illustrator

chemicals in the ink

I swear to God

Tory: Oh I be tew so seek

I am all weak and twitchy

Drew: noooo

Tory: dew not like

Drew: D:

Should I make you soups?

Tory: awwwwws

Drew: Delicious soups?

Tory: I am drinking lots of tea

and in a hot minnit

I’m gonna lie down

and watch Danger Mouses

Drew: Awww

Tory: I finally tewk some medicines

and whatnot

which is smart

I don’t know why I get all confused about medicine

like

wait!

Medicine exists!

Drew: haha

It does

Tory: DID YOU KNOW THAT?

Drew: Yah

I’m on a govt list

cause I like psuedophedrine

Tory: ha ha ha

DRUGGEE!

Tory: Okay. Why is Emma Frost have a British accent if she’s from Boston?

Drew: In a word: grant morrison

He wrote her with lots of hoity toity britishisms

basically had her faking it to be fancy

then got rolled into continuity in another book

where she had a psychic fight with a former friend

who was english

emma killed her, but was imprinted with part of her mind

which manifests as the accent

Tory: !!!!